Words: Karl Fuhre Photos: Evan Chandler-Soanes Above: Sean O’Brien
The Partysnake is no myth. He’s the real deal and if you’re not careful he will get you. He’s everywhere, watching, patiently waiting for a slip-up, an opportunity to attack. You may not think you know what the Partysnake is, you may think you’re safe from his potent strike, but there’s a good chance you’ve already felt his bite before.Have you ever woken up somewhere you don’t remember falling asleep? Have you ever asked yourself, “What in the hell happened last night?” Have you ever been told crazy stories of embarrassing things you have no recollection of doing? And the clincher: have you ever woken up feeling so bad that you promised yourself that you’d never drink again? If any of this sounds familiar you’ve definitely been bitten by the Partysnake. Click “Continue…” to read/see the rest of the story.
Above: Pat Begly
After all, there has to be a reason why those adult bevies keep getting more slippery the more you have. Why the second drink always feels so good and puts that dumb smirk on your face. Why that round of shots at last call always seems like the right choice. It’s because a little bit of the Partysnake lurks in every drink. The more you consume, the more power he gains, until eventually he overpowers your brain and erases all memory of the horrible things you did the night before the Snake gave you the worst hangover of your life.
Understanding that the Partysnake exists and that he’s always hunting is the first step towards learning how to avoid him. Mere awareness, however, definitely doesn’t mean you’re safe. The Partysnake is a mysterious and complex creature whom only a lucky few will ever figure out. Most never do.
Above: Illustration by Karl Fuhre
Enter “Partysnake: The Movie.” Put together by a crew of up-and-coming shreds, the film showcases their skills on the hills and documents their run-ins with the serpent prick, hopefully educating the masses about his heinous ways.
Here are some testimonials from the film makers and subjects:
Patrick-Rochon Begley
On this particular incident with the Partysnake I wasn’t the only victim. My buddy Travis Monds’ grandma owns a hotel in Whistler, apparently, and he gets free rooms. What we didn’t know is that he’s a kleptomaniac and enjoys going through people’s pockets when they pass out. Long story short, in the words of the beautiful Beyoncé: my wallet is not “irreplaceable” and his nose is now “to the left.” Pretty obvious the Partysnake made me do it.
Above: Sean O’Brien
Rupert Davies
This one time in Government Camp the Partysnake fed me an overdose of 151 and tequila. He promptly duct-taped me into an Edward Fortyhands (each hand duct taped to a 40 oz) and I guess I smashed them and started swinging bloody glass all up in the Snake’s face. I think I got naked after that and ignorantly cussed out my friends. I woke up in my bent tent covered in blood, with no recollection and some sweet bite marks.
Adam Mills
Two years back we were in the nice little town of Big White for the Coastal team trip. This was my first year on a team trip and it was a memorable one. One night, as I remember, involved too much grease and I woke up the next morning with no eyebrows and the facial hair from only the left side of my face shaved off. Plus my face and arms were fully blacked-out with Sharpie. Never been back to Big White since. I don’t think I’m ever allowed back. Damn Partysnake.
Matt Standish
Every time I wake up with my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth I know I’ve been visited by the Partysnake. We have a love-hate relationship: he loves me and I hate him. It’s a work in progress.
Rahim Dina
At the Rave Cave (featured above) I received a nasty bite from the Partysnake right in the throat. Bastard must’ve just crept up on me from a tree and dipped its fangs into my face. I was unable to roll barney. Not the purple dinosaur – that shit my niggaz ridin’ on.
Watch the movie here PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4 AND PART 5
Tags: Adam Mills, Danny Hagge, Devun Walsh, Dickie Pricklestein, Evan Chandler-Soanes, IS EYEWEAR, Karl Fuhre, Madda, Matt Heneghan, Matt Standish, Nic Heringa, Party Snake, Patrick-Rochon Begley, Rahim Dina, Rupert Davies, Russell Lee, Scott Sych, Sean O'brien
